Daily · Rant

So I have succumbed to ANTM (Uh, America's Next Top Model for those of you unaware)... from the girl with the snaggletooth (but a real "connection") to the unfairly righteous girl Jade (so over it) to the obnoxiously whiny Asian girl (can't remember anyone's name but Jade... exactly her point, I presume). Usually I don't get sucked into this show until the marathon sessions about a year after the actual "cycle" (Tyra calls them cycles, get with it) run. The girl I tutor swears by the show though, so I decided to actually watch in order to keep up. It really doesn't take much to talk me into watching a show anymore, unfortunately. However, as I sit staring at the TV screen, I am thinking to myself "Seriously? I'm really watching this?" I have a great book sitting on my dresser that I'm only 50 pages into, and I choose to watch this smut. Well, not smut, but trash. My favorite part of these shows has to be the commercials interspersed between the crap. Mariah Carey's new fragrance "M" for starters. Talk about smut. I'm trying to pretend to be her marketing exec, sitting back in my leather executive chair (I am an executive, after all) and putting my Mont Blanc pen tip to my lips.... "Hmm. How will we sell the fragrance of a washed up has been who's last movie performance/appearance was a completely self-indulgent, ergo pathetic showing of talent, aptly named 'Glitter'?" Oh YES, by george, I've got it. Show her half naked in purple water rubbing the fragrance between 'the girls', with a soundtrack of moaning. Fabulous. Rake it in, Mariah. This is one consumer who won't even bother to smell the eau.

Next rant (I did name this the Daily Rant for a reason). The Hills. I've heard from many a source that the show is quite riveting. Buh-lech. Anything but. LC loses IQ points as each day passes, much to my demise. I honestly do not understand how the fans of this show still have active brain waves. (Uh yah, I did just say that) And I realize I'm offending many by making these quite brash statements, but seriously. Let me introduce you to a revolution discovered many, many years ago. Literature. Wait, what's that? Ah, yes, the tales of yore, all written on paper for your perusal. Some might have difficulty deciphering the "text" however, as it is not in the web lingo they are so accustomed to. God help the soul reading Shakespeare, they'd need a translation service just to read the title. you get my point. Even when texting I make an effort to avoid abbreviations. Language is an art, perhaps this is why I majored in French. I really get turned on by it. OK, enough with my fetishes, tell me about yours.

Aaaaand yet another (rant, not fetish you sicko)! I'm neverending tonight. I find myself incredibly witty after a glass of wine. Used to take several, but hey, getting old really is a bitch. So this Tila Tequila person? What? Who? And her claim to fame is.... a sexually undecided hot 20 something? WHOA, let's film THAT. That truly is groundbreaking. And I SO believe the boys (and Barbie-ish girls who are probably posing as lesbians solely for the uh, 'street cred'? or 15 minutes... hmmm...) thinking that after 5 minutes of interaction with "Tila" that they are SO in love with her, would do anything for her (except for sign a pre-nup), and some who even venture to say "I could TOTALLY see myself falling (fut.) in love with her". Yeah, I can see myself falling in love with a million dollar an episode paycheck too.

Yeah, I know, my blog is one continuous run on sentence. But I found myself thinking of these cute little quips that I felt completely necessary to share with the world, and then I realized "Oh heyyyyyyyyy, THAT'S why people blog!" I had done this before, popped the cherry per se, but this might become a regular occurrence now. Yummy :)

So after retreating from my random LJ posts for almost 2 years, I'm back. I've lost the captive audience I once had, I'm sure, but I have no qualms that they will soon be back. K I'm full of it and simply not that interesting, so this is just where I'm going to write.

It was funny to me to go back and read all of my old posts. My God, how far I've come and I still have so much to learn. One of my last posts was about graduating, and if you've talked to me recently, you know how far that piece of paper saying I'm educated has gotten me. Today was a real milestone of intelligence at work... I got to write out invitations for my brain surgeon of a boss for a talk he's giving to his "peers" (aka people that can refer sick people to him). He is a pretty cool boss though, makes good jokes (rare for a doctor that specialized) and treats us well. Still, I need something more.


Anyhow, I should probably get back to work since I've accomplished next to nothing today. Lots of people want surgery and I guess I should schedule him so the dr. and I continued getting paid. Even if there is such a large disparity between his paycheck and mine it's sickening. Oh wait, he does brain surgery, there's my answer. Did I pick the wrong career or what?